I have a “Quitter” I’m not going to lie. This child is also my perfectionist. So if whatever they are working on doesn’t work out the first or second time its complete meltdown mode, “I’m the worst!” “Everyone is smarter than me! “Forget it”. Then we swoop in as parents trying to be compassionate but let’s be real…slightly irritated, reminding them that they are smart and people like Albert Einstein didn’t quit! How do we teach our children about not quitting and finishing no matter how long it takes or whatever the outcome? Well, first we need to teach them about perseverance! This article by Focus on the Family is a good start for all ages of children.
It’s great to have articles, podcasts and videos to help us parent but the best place you can go for the truest, most helpful way to parent is the Bible. Like we talked about with the kids last week the Bible is how God speaks to us today! Here are some verses about perseverance to share with your children.
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!
– Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
When my first child was born I pretty much would have been at the doctor every day if I hadn’t had my sister to calm me down. There was absolutely nothing wrong with my daughter but there were a bunch of “firsts” that I didn’t know were normal or not. I literally called her at least 5 times a day. My sister has four kids and is the most laid back mama ever! She probably wasn’t like that when she had her first child but along the motherhood way, she’s had the wisdom to find mentors and good mom friends to come around her.
They let her know that whatever was happening with her children was ok and she would get through it. I’m so glad I have her (now I only call her 3 times a day) because let me tell you your kids will do things that are so weird you don’t even want to share with others but once you get over the shock…you do share and find out those things are quite normal! Or at least you are not alone. I’ve also come to realize in this journey of motherhood that all phases of our children’s lives have good and bad.
That “terrible 2s” phase rears its ugly head around 6 then again at 10 and for sure 13! We need women in our lives who relieve the mom guilt and help us navigate through the rough waters and cheer us on when there is smooth sailing.
This article “Don’t Do Motherhood Alone” by Family Life Ministries is so great! We all need someone to talk to and not feel judged or paranoid. Someone we can share our goods and bads. Someone who will gently call us out and guide us back into reality.
We can’t use the argument “because I said so” forever! At some point, we need to share with our children how to have a personal relationship with their Savior. We need to prepare their hearts to have enough faith and confidence in what they know to share with others and be able to defend their beliefs. If we as parents and church family are unable to help establish this important foundation how will our children be able to stand up for what they believe in when they are confronted…and they will be at some point in their lives.
It all starts with the questions they ask and how we answer them. The president of Cru put it like this…”The holes in people’s lives are often the best places for the Gospel to flow through.” That includes the holes in our children’s lives. We can fill them with all we know but we need to make sure they truly believe it for themselves. Not to scare any of you but I kinda want to….the following article gives a very real-life wake-up call for all of us!
But don’t lose hope!!! We are now equipped with this knowledge and can do something about it!
“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect…”1 Peter 3:15…this includes questions our children ask!